I had my picture taken today. My children also had their pictures made today. Do you have any idea how impossible it feels to get three people picture-ready before 7:30am?
I woke up early, had an extra trough of coffee to keep my energy and attitude up, showered immediately after seeing myself in the mirror looking like a less attractive Nick Nolte mug shot photo, fed the dogs, made the lunches, picked the clothes, found the shoes, put on an extra layer of the daily Lancome “mask” (that’s what the kids call make up) and then began the 15 minute battle to wake the children up.
They are little angels in the mornings, aren’t they? I always take a second to look at them before I wake them up. It’s the deep breath I need to start my day. It’s a better pick me up than all the coffee in the world. It’s also my last moment of silence before the skirmish begins.
No matter how soft my voice is, no matter how early they went to sleep, when I try to wake them up, these children twist and turn all over the bed like vampires exposed to daylight. The moaning and mumbling kicks in and they arch their backs like their spines melted over night. My sweet talk continues, wishing them a good morning and rubbing their little backs. But the moaning gets louder, the pouts begin and the grumblings become bargainings for five more minutes.
**Side note – why is it that on the weekends, they are perfectly content to wake up by 6am on their own and want to talk and be cute? But the weekday hits and nooooooooooo, they are growing and need 4 more hours of sleep. Not cool.**
At about the 10 minute mark, my voice grows from a whisper, the covers get ripped back and I start announcing the time (I may embellish a bit to make my point). From the time their little feet hit the floor, I feel like a drill sergeant blowing the whistle as their time runs out to perform each of their tasks.
But it’s picture day, so everything that needs to get done, needs to get done without wrinkling, food staining, toothpaste drooling, milk spilling, paw prints marking, hair blowing, falling down, or tripping up. And bonus, all of this needs to be done while keeping them in their happy place so they will smile pretty for the camera.
It was shaky there for a bit, but we managed to get to school on time. Everyone was in a good mood. Everyone looked adorable. The promise of a good day was upon us.
Here’s hoping my kids smiled and said “Pokeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeemon”.
#PictureDayStress
#PictureDayEqualsBlackmailMaterialForYourParents
#NothingBeatsSchoolPicsFromTheEighties
Outrageously Ordinary 